Yeah, I said it…

Disclaimer: I wrote this back in 2014. I can’t even remember the exact person or situation. My reaction though can be applied to many situations and timeless. I was saving it for the next book, but felt led to share today.

A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.A man’s belly shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth; and with the increase of his lips shall he be filled.Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.  Proverb 18:19-21

After the words came out of my mouth, I recognized they hurt.  It bruised a relationship bad!

I said something dreadful while emotional, in language I don’t normally use to “back” someone off of me during a discussion. All trust, all faith, all Godliness left – I was fully in sinful Daphne – and I said it. (Actually said it more than once…) With my mere words, I could have “killed” a longtime friendship. I also might have wrecked my witness.

What was I thinking – more importantly where was my heart?  I wasn’t acting out in love.  (…and we know who love is.)  Actually at the time my heart was trying to protect itself.  Unfortunately, I was trying to attempt to take care of me and my heart, and not allowing God to do so.  So, while in conversation with someone that has a portion of my heart – someone who “I” allow to influence my emotions, I lost my temper.  In fear my emotions got the best of me.

As I examined what was going on within me and began to pray, I remembered John 7:38 –He that believeth on me, as the scripture hath said, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water.  I recognize I’ve lost belief and lost faith.  “Living water” – life – we have the potential to speak life out of our mouths through our belief, our faith.

I confess – lately I haven’t had personal worship time. I haven’t had my usual prayer or study time. I haven’t even been writing. Worse yet, I haven’t made God a priority. Work, family, friends and so much more has taken up all of my time. Then, even when I have had a few moments of time I haven’t given it to Him. I’ve been idle. Just living day to day has filled me with discouragement, confusion, fear, negativity – and has left me drained, tired and frustrated. Frustrated with people. Frustrated about money. Generally frustrated with life’s situations. What I’ve been filling myself with came out – pouring haphazardly out of my mouth. I should have known, before the hurtful words even came forth, came the futile emotions and tears. Daphne’s carnal side was in full control…

After our confession of sin needs to come correction from God.  Through scripture He spoke to me – So then faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God.  (Romans 10:17)

So now I know I need the Word of God to assure me, so next I read –The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: He leadeth me beside the still waters.He restoreth my soul: He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for Thou art with me; Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me.Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: Thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever. (Psalm 23)

I pray Lord that You help me to – Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord, my strength, and my redeemer. (Psalm 19:13-14) Help me not “kill” friendships or relationships with ungodly things that come across my tongue. Please discipline me to fill my belly daily with good faithful things through meditation of your Word. Have my cup run over with “living water” – good words and words that speak life. Help me to be less of Daphne and more of you when dealing with others. I thank you in advance and will be so careful to always give You all the Glory and Honor when successful in walking in you. In the mighty name of Jesus I pray, Amen.