Dad Nugget #2 – There by the grace of God go I.

“If there be therefore any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies, fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.

Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.

Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.

Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus: who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: but made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: and being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.”
‭‭Philippians‬ ‭2:1-8‬ ‭KJV‬‬

I think I could write a book on all the valuable nuggets my father, Donald M. Evans, Sr left me. Again, I’m writing to express my grief and loss of the man that had a profound effect on my life. This particular story I mentioned in the introduction of my book, but I really didn’t go into detail.

I was a teen or preteen. I believe it was the summertime because I tended to catch the bus to downtown Wilmington to either have lunch with my Dad or go down to hang out with friends at a lunch spot called the Patio. I would catch a ride back home with my Dad when he got off of work at the federal building around 4:00.

At that time, my Dad parked daily in a lot just below 9th & Walnut Streets. Guys hung out in that lot all day. They looked like they were homeless and drank the day away.

Stark contrast to my pressed and clean father who was a Large Case Manager for the IRS. I always admired him in his perfectly self-shined shoes and was amazed by the sheer numbers of ties he had. His hair was always cut and he was always shaved. Smile – if ever asked what my favorite scent is – the smell of the bathroom of my parents’ house after my Dad got dressed overwhelmed by the fragrant aroma of Royal Copenhagen Musk – his favorite cologne. (I always went in to prepare for school after him.) He looked SHARP and smelled good!

So as a judgemental kid, seeing him not only acknowledge those men I had snubbed in the parking lot, but then tell me to go to the car so he could go over and hold a conversation with them was shocking to me! He talked to one particular man for what seemed a long while. They talked and laughed. They seemed happy to see one another.

When he came back to the car I asked, “Why are you talking to him?” My Dad replied, “There by the grace of God go I. Daphne, that was a good friend of mine growing up in Southbridge. One wrong choice and that could have been me.”

My Dad dropped that nugget of wisdom on me and I’ve never forgot. The internet attributes the quote to a John Bradford who said a phrase similar when he saw prisoners about to be executed. It signifies humbleness and humility.

This interaction with my Dad is probably why I’m passionate about the work I do with children and families. I had a blessed childhood and have a blessed life. My life could have been different. I work with families that might not have the same. I pray I treat them with the respect and dignity that my Dad did with that man that day.

Now, I can equate that wisdom to the scripture Philippians 2;3:

“Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.”

My earthly father without verse or scripture modeled a heavenly principle. Oh what a concept to not look down upon folk, but esteem them better and attempt to lift them up!

Let us remember this Donald nugget – There by the grace of God go I. Let us esteem others better than ourselves.